One week into being 30 and can I just say I am happy my 20's are over? I am happy, quite ecstatic actually. My 20's were a mix of happy and sad, joy and pain...like I think anyone's life is - but at moments it was just downright hell. I will report that it was really the first 4 years into my 20's that were misery to the point where I just wanted to check out. Isn't that sad? To be 24 years old and think life has just handed you a bad hand and you don't want to play anymore - its not a groovy place to be. Its not because my childhood was bad, or my parents didn't love me. Quite the opposite. For whatever reason, some of us come to a point in life where we take the wrong path. And sometimes, we travel too far, some of us never come back, and sometimes we get the gift of being restored. I've been given that gift.
The adventure is that since my 25th birthday, the world has opened up and smiled. Or maybe the world was always smiling, but I could never see it. The last 5 years have been absolutely amazing, and it just keeps getting better and better. I have a life beyond my wildest dreams -to date. That is not to say it has been a bed of roses, but it sure beats what could have been.
I think the best part of turning 30 is not just the whole older, wiser thing. But I have a stronger sense of self. I know who I am, what I am, what I want (although that continues to change), what I stand for, what I will tolerate and what I will not, I am able to stand up for myself and not apologize because you didn't like the answer I gave you. I am not into the nonsense - leave that to someone else. That right there is priceless. I suffer not wanting to have gone through all the growing pains, to get those gifts, but I guess that is the deal and that will continue to be the deal. However, I have come to the place where I have peace and serenity in my head and in my heart - the majority of the time.
I know that life is the change, its always changing and the adventure is that we get to continue to change, if we want to. We can continue to learn about ourselves, which is really very cool. I have an amazing job, I live in a beautiful place, I have friends and family that love me and I love them, I have a quaint little home and a cute little car and a fabulous wardrobe, I do love the finer things. These are the tangible gifts I have - the things I touch and see - its the intangible, faith, hope, peace of mind, being comfortable in my skin, love and the general sense that THIS is the good life. Those are the gifts that on my 30th birthday mean the most.